Halftime

Now we are over the hump, water has found it’s level and sadly, for the Leafs, that level is below .500. The bright side? Toronto is not the worst team in the Northeast division, they aren’t even the worst team in the province.

Now, let’s take a look at the league:

Eastern Conference:

  1. Philadelphia – Not one team in the league is happier that Tomas Kaberle refuses to waive his no trade clause.
  2. Tampa Bay – After thinking the team had a shot at the cup Tampa finally decided it was best to play with a goalie in net, trading for Roloson.
  3. Boston – 3rd place in the conference by default as the Northeast division replaces the Southeast at the bottom of the barrel.
  4. Pittsburgh – March of the penguins turns into a crawl with Sid the Kid out and Malkin on vacation.
  5. Washington – Interesting note – bad year for Ovechkin is still better then anyone from Ottawa.
  6. NY Rangers – The deeply troubled mind of GM Glen Sather replaces one under producing forward with another. Fans suffer flashbacks to every other season.
  7. Montreal – Apparently Habs fans have believed in Carey Price all along, who would have guessed.
  8. Atlanta – Rumours indicate the team conspired with former Thrasher Kovalchuk to remove perennial playoff threat from the equation to open up one more slot. Even so, post season not a lock.
  9. Carolina – Coach Paul Maurice trying to coach as many former Leafs as possible to prove it wasn’t his fault the team sucked.
  10. Florida – Maintaining lower midrange finish to maximize future mediocrity.
  11. Buffalo – It’s Miller Time… after each and every game for Lindy Ruff and staff.
  12. Toronto – Continue their meteoric rise toward Stanley Cup contention in 2020.
  13. Ottawa – Sky diving without a parachute, instead the pull string simply releases Kovalev, Gonchar and Clouston at years end.
  14. NY Islanders – Kansas City, Winnipeg and Quebec City await the end of the arena lease with bated breath.
  15. New Jersey – Kovalchuk is paying for signing a deal with the devil, as is the rest of the team.

Western Conference:

  1. Vancouver – Brian Burke and Dave Nonis weep late at night as they watch the team they built succeed while some former agent takes credit.
  2. Detroit – Still a powerhouse despite increasing numbers of players requiring walkers to get to rink.
  3. Dallas – Finding heaps of success from unusual places, mainly Raycroft and Lehtonen.
  4. Phoenix – Another strong season has all three Arizona hockey fans excited, not the mention all the Canadians on holiday.
  5. NashvilleSolid fundamentals make for plenty of wins and allow for mid-game naps for weary fans.
  6. Chicago First ever Cup Champ Firesale may have left the Hawks burned. That and the extensive smoke damage to Keith make a repeat unlikely.
  7. Anaheim Amazing on paper, less so on the ice, insiders suggest the Ducks may enlist Emilio Estevez for remainder of season.
  8. Colorado The “Avalanche” may better describe how fast goalie Craig Anderson’s numbers are falling.
  9. Los Angeles Despite talented lineup the main marketing tool remains “Remember when we had Gretzky?”
  10. Minnesota About as successful with the good Koivu as the Canadiens were with the overrated Koivu.
  11. San Jose To any team looking for a goalie, see how useless these Sharks are without Nabokov?
  12. St. LouisAttempting to acquire Crosby at the deadline then release him as a free agent this summer.
  13. Columbus Poor, poor Rick Nash, What were you thinking? How many years left?
  14. Calgary One Sutter down, one more soon to follow as a result the whole Sutter Family swears vengeance on Olli Jokinen.
  15. Edmonton Plan to acquire most top 3 picks in league history right on course.
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